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I used to hear that the French were unfriendly, and that fitting in would be a difficult task. People said it was nearly impossible to become part of established French friend groups, like trying to open an oyster with a dull blade. However, after living here for two and a half years, I have many French friends who are very close to me. So, what is the key to being accepted?
French friendship groups are a hotchpotch of every different style, interest and way of life, and herein is your golden ticket. You, with your funny British accent and odd ways, are different, so there’s a spot waiting for you.
In my UK home, my closest friends are a close-knit group of British girls who have grown and changed together, similar to the stereotypical American high school cliques. We have similar appearances, dress styles, and interests. However, in France, relationships from childhood often last, but they do not necessarily influence each other’s fashion or hobbies. For example, heavy metal enthusiasts and house music fans can peacefully coexist.
Bonding with the French through the enjoyment of delicious food and wine is a great way to socialize.
Learn more about traveling to France.
The most crucial factor in winning the affection of the French people is making an effort to speak their language. It is impossible to form a connection with individuals if you cannot communicate with them. Even if your French skills are not perfect, there will always be understanding individuals willing to be patient with you. However, the expectation for everyone else to speak English solely for your convenience may not be well received. As a foreigner, mistakes are inevitable and it is important to be able to laugh at yourself and turn them into funny stories. For instance, I once mixed up the words for ‘puppy’ and ‘toilet’ (‘chiot’ and ‘chiotte’), which was quite entertaining for those around me as I announced my desire to adopt a toilet.
Cannot reword, this is not a complete sentence.
As adolescents, we may have made friends by getting intoxicated and causing chaos, but this behavior will not make a good impression on the French. British citizens are already known for their unruly behaviors when abroad, so it is important to avoid getting drunk and disorderly. The French enjoy drinking, and bonding over a glass of wine and delicious food is a wonderful way to connect with others. However, vomiting and loudly yelling in increasingly incomprehensible English is not enjoyable for anyone.
Criticism is encouraged, but it should be directed towards relevant issues. It is acceptable to criticize the government. You can also complain about transportation, administration, and the increasing prices of pain au chocolat. However, it is never acceptable to criticize the quality of French cuisine. You may also poke fun at British food and laugh at yourself when hearing stories of others’ unfortunate experiences during a British school exchange where they were only fed Monster Munch and crustless jam sandwiches, fearing malnutrition.
Being overly friendly can sometimes be misunderstood as insincerity in France. This is due to the country’s use of both formal and informal versions of the word “you” – “vous” and “tu”. It is recommended to be polite in the beginning before showing displays of affection.
Please don’t be easily offended. Even though the French language is known for its flowery expressions and elaborateness, they tend to be more straightforward than us. Saying “I don’t have time to talk now” or “That’s a weird skirt” doesn’t necessarily mean “I hate you” or “I hate your entire wardrobe.” It simply means what it says.
Trying to communicate well in the language is essential for forming connections with people in France.
It is possible that they will dislike all of your outfits, especially if your mini skirt is too brief and worn without stockings. Another common belief in France is that the British, despite our unpredictable climate, avoid wearing sufficient attire.
This is true across France, except in Paris, where the locals themselves are hesitant to socialize and no one seems to have any friends. We are familiar with the concept of Paris syndrome, where the beautiful city of Paris fails to meet tourists’ expectations and leaves them feeling rejected and alone.
I am joking, of course, and I have several Parisian friends. However, like Londoners in other parts of the UK, Parisians are often thought of as unapproachable. In my opinion, this is simply a result of busy lifestyles, just like in London, and not intentional rudeness.
Making friends in France is not a difficult task, as long as you put effort into it, it is likely to be met with mutual effort in return. There is a saying that suggests that while France is a beautiful country, the people can be challenging to deal with. However, I am grateful that they exist, as I cannot imagine my life without them.
Source: independent.co.uk
